Talking about divorce

I keep deleting and rewriting this post, because I don’t want to make it sound like I’m callously walking away from the life Ian and I built, turning my back with nary a twinge. Every time I write something, it comes out sounding like I’m unalloyed happy to be going through this process.

Nothing could be further from the truth: I have good days and bad days. Good days, I optimistically look forward to a future where Ian and I co-parent Benji collaboratively and with goodwill toward each other, but continue growing and pursuing our lives otherwise independently. Bad days, I go for 10 miles of walks and then take a break by going for a long car drive because I’m too restless and anxious from all the change, afraid I’m selfishly pursuing a course that will irreparably damage Benji. Continue Reading >>

Not everything is forever

Let’s cut to the chase: I’m divorcing Ian.

For this post, in the interest of balance and because this topic so deeply impacts both of us, Ian and are each going to share our perspectives.

Katie

Now for some context, without getting into unnecessary detail. Despite uncountable hours of marriage and individual therapy, we got to a point where I couldn’t envision living the rest of my life in our marriage. It took me a long time to accept that I needed to take this step, and I’m not doing it because I hate Ian — I don’t. Continue Reading >>